Upon my eventual arrival in turn of the century Russia, i punctually honoured my dinner engagement with the last Tsarina of Russia, Aleksandra, who i found to be awaiting my presence in a regal state of supressed anticipation and aloof graciousness.
Her appearance was initially cool and reserved but my twinkling eyes and beguiling smile would soon have her warming to my odious charms as she witnessed my unrestrained appreciation of the Royal Vodka Trifle and my then taking untold liberties with her Imperial muffins.
She was reputed to be the secret lover of the mad monk himself, Rasputin, the dirty old dog, so why shouldn't i try my luck with the elegant lady too?
Fortunately for me, my arrival coincided with the Tsar being absent on urgent business whilst Rasputin himself was lying very drunk in the chamber of a vivacious young lady of ill-repute from St.Petersburg.
Her Highness personally presented me with a jewel-encrusted Faberge egg...she did look a little unnerved when i tried to eat it but my faux pas was quickly overlooked when i began softly singing to her a selection of glam rock classics, the likes of which i'm sure none of her royal courtiers had ever graced her with before.
By the time i'd finished my raucous, tuneless renditions of Ballroom Blitz, Skweeze Me Pleeze Me and Telegram Sam she was softening somewhat visibly, demurely making eyes at me and frequently commanding the servants to keep my glass topped-up.
A fine and noble Russian Empress she may have been, but decency, modesty and tact demand that i reveal no further events transpiring that dark evening...
...suffice to say that although i found the Royal bedchamber most luxurious and comfortable, i had not a single wink of sleep that cold, cold Russian night.
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Dragonlady77
Now far be it from me to dis-illusion you young lothario, but i happen to be a very close friend of your wife, and if you had been partaking of anyone's muffins royal or otherwise she would have been screeching at me on the phone and on line. So please can you stick to the truth in future and just say you had shared a very fruity trifling time with her. lol. As for Rasputin impossible he was closeted with all night. Some sane person has to keep a close eye on him.
Now don't forget be truthful in future my third eye is watching you.
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